See ya, summer!

Last night Kenna Mae crawled up in our bed to cuddle while Jason and I were watching our favorite show, The Mentalist. AWESOME SHOW.

Then I proceeded to cry off and on until I fell asleep 2 hours later.

I am struggling people.

I expect that every Momma out there that has stayed at home with their kidlets completely understand.

I also expect those that haven't completely do not understand.

My kids have never been to daycare.

Not that I have some crazy notion that there is anything WRONG with daycare.

I don't. I appreciate that some women just cannot stay home with their kids AND stay sane.

I, however, was born knowing that this is what I wanted for my life.

I WANT to stay home and raise my babies.

I feel blessed to have married a man who wanted that for me in return.

I can only recall a few days in the last 12 years that I have stood alone in my home.

This house is sure going to seem big come Monday.

When I chose 12 years ago to stay home with the kids I knew there would be a day that they would all go to school. But, that day seemed so far away.

And now we are there.

This time is so confusing for me right now.

I have been a self confident, proud SAHM most of my adult life.

I have taken great pride in the fact that the job I do here at home I do well.

For the most part, because lets don't forget the constant brawling I do with laundry.:)

Will I feel lazy being home all day?

Will I be bored?

Will I learn to love laundry?

Will I decide that what I really want to do with my life is work at the firm with Jason?(hmmmm:))

Will I volunteer at the school so I can lay my eyes on them even while they work?

I guess at this point I will just cry off and on for the next week or so.

And pray...pray alot.

And play it by ear.

I hope your summer has been as blessed as mine.

Summer 2010...

YOU ROCKED IT!